I've heard of empty-nest syndrome, but I always wondered what they were talking about. The people I know whose kids have left the house are deliriously happy about it.

Since the 1970s, relationship experts have popularized the notion of “empty nest syndrome,” a time of depression and loss of purpose that plagues parents, especially mothers, when their children leave home. Dozens of Web sites and books have been created to help parents weather the transition. Simon & Schuster has even introduced a “Chicken Soup for the Soul” dedicated to empty nesters.

But a growing body of research suggests that the phenomenon has been misunderstood. While most parents clearly miss children who have left home for college, jobs or marriage, they also enjoy the greater freedom and relaxed responsibility.

And despite the common worry that long-married couples will find themselves with nothing in common, the new research, published in November in the journal Psychological Science, shows that marital satisfaction actually improves when the children finally take their exits.

I can tell you exactly why this is an anachronism. Cell phones and the internet make staying in touch with your kids, and just about anybody else, a trivial exercise. I talk to my daughter a least two or three times a week. The lovely bunny talks to her every day. My sons are less tied to the apron strings, but I'll talk to each of them at least once a week. You can't miss people that you are in constant contact with, even if they aren't physically present.

The nice part about the kids leaving home is that, well, its your home again. You don't realize until after everybody is gone, how many minor irritations you put up with for years and years. When I buy a bag of baked Cheetos, I actually get a handful--in fact the bag pretty much lasts as long as I want it to. Everything stays clean and everything is exactly where I left it. Life just gets easier in so many respects.

So what's the depression about? I suspect that for some people its simply the fact that for twenty, twenty-five years, everything is about the kids, and then its not. Parenthood is a big adjustment on entry and on exit. Some years ago I went golfing with a guy who had recently emptied his nest. He was feeling terribly guilty about his shiny new golf clubs. He'd been sacrificing for his children's education for years, and suddenly he didn't have to anymore. Intellectually he knew he could afford to spend the money, but emotionally he just wasn't there yet.

Me? Not having that problem.

Not a parody--well maybe a bit of superiority by the Times, as usual. Dating a banker anonymous. NY Times:

They shared their sad stories the other night at an informal gathering of Dating a Banker Anonymous, a support group founded in November to help women cope with the inevitable relationship fallout from, say, the collapse of Lehman Brothers or the Dow’s shedding 777 points in a single day, as it did on Sept. 29.

In addition to meeting once or twice weekly for brunch or drinks at a bar or restaurant, the group has a blog, billed as “free from the scrutiny of feminists,” that invites women to join “if your monthly Bergdorf’s allowance has been halved and bottle service has all but disappeared from your life.”

From Honu Girl.

Apparently this is a list of 100 classics in the estimation of the BBC, of which they believe most people will have only read six on average. Like all list there are some inarguable entries, some glaring omissions, and some puzzlers present. I've put an (x) by the one's I've read and a (x)+ for the one's I've read and loved.

I am curious as to why at least some of Mark Twain's works didn't make the list. British prejudice?

The view from my room:

Google now has Street View for London. Apparently some poor sod drove around most London streets and snapped 360 degree views every 20 seconds. Here's a typical slice of London life. You can tell it's not Salt Lake City.

The reindeer antlers are a nice touch. I hope you'll all visit London soon. If you're interested in London, this snappy video (not mine) samples the complexity of my native city. It may not be wholesome, but it is addictive, especially to photographers like me.

This takes a minute to download.

Englewood, NJ, is one of the most copacetic suburbs I know. If Christie beats Corzine in a couple of weeks then northern New Jersey may be flooded with boat people from NYC, fleeing Big Tax. The NJ coastguard will be rescuing raft people from the West River and returning them weeping to the West Side Highway where Bloomberg and Paterson will be waiting with greedy grins.

The guy in the striped shorts is a star, but Poncho Lady at 2.20 has a smile from Central Casting in the sky.